Joke of the week

A group of friends go to a new restaurant and notice all the staff members have spoons in their pockets.
 ‘Why do the staff carry spoons in their pockets?’ a diner asks the waiter.
‘Well,’ the waiter explains, ‘the owner hired a firm of efficiency consultants, who concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. So if staff members were well prepared, we could reduce the number of trips to collect clean spoons – and save 15 man-hours per shift.’
Sure enough, one of the group drops her spoon, and the waiter replaces it with his spare one.
A second member of the group notices there is a string hanging out of the waiter’s trousers. And, looking around, she sees that all the waiters have strings hanging out of their trousers.
‘Excuse me,’ she asks, ‘but what is that string for?’
The waiter lowers his voice. ‘The consultants also realised we could save time in the toilets,’ he says. ‘We tie this string to the tip of our you-know-what to pull it out without touching it – saving us the need to wash our hands. That shortens toilet time by over 70 per cent.’
‘But how do you put your willy back?’ the girl asks, bemused.
 ‘Well,’ whispers the waiter, ‘I’ve not asked the others, but me, I use the spoon.’